Marriage is wonderful but it also comes with a learning curve. Partners think differently and are shaped by our own experiences, personalities and beliefs. One of the key components of marriage is the ability to step outside yourself and see situations from your spouse’s perspective.
Here are two resources that help with just that! Read on to find out more about two of my favorite marriage must have books!
Now of course there will also be individuals that don’t fit into a generalization but I found this book to be spot on. It really helped me understand my husband’s perspective and strengths. I also shared the information with him to explain why certain things tend to come more easily to me and other things not so much! This book answers time tested questions such as, “Why can’t my husband find anything in the refrigerator?” and “Why is it that I can listen to four conversations at once in a diner but my husband needs silence for one?” It’s not idiosyncrasies…it’s science! This husband and wife author team use both their voices and perspectives to create a book based on the science of the female and male brain to explain what each needs, excels and struggles with in day to day life and the biological reasons behind it all. There is even a quiz for you and your partner to take to examine your own brain needs. It is a quick read with many visuals to break down complicated concepts.
This book isn’t just great for marriages…it is a wonderful resource for understanding all of your loved ones. The idea is that we all view , give and feel love based on our own love language. Sometimes couples (or even children and relatives) do not have the same love language and miss the signs of love that they should be receiving…or sharing. Knowing your own love language is important to helping your spouse understand what you look for to feel loved and how you show it. Perhaps your love language is doing service acts. You pack your spouse lunch, you drop off their mail at the post office, you let them sleep in and handle the morning routine. You may expect those same things in return to feel loved but maybe your spouse’s love language is spending time with you. They may expect you to sleep in with them in the morning, pack lunches together, plan errands to do with each other…same message..LOVE but different languages. This book is such an important read. It really changes the way you receive and do little things each day. It can help you see your loved ones with new eyes and a new appreciation.
The wedding registry has received a huge makeover in the last decade. Couples no longer have to even visit a store to create a registry. They can do it while hanging out on the couch with laptops in hand and do the whole thing online. Couples also have options such as one registry that includes multiple stores, online registries that provide endless product options (e.g. Amazon) and even sites where couples can collect money in lieu of actual gifts to help them with date nights and their honeymoon fund. The latter options have become popular among couples who live together prior to the wedding who feel like they have all the household items they need already.
There is some debate over cash gifts and registry funds. Some guests and brides love them and some guests prefer physically picking out and buying a gift. What do you do if you have everything your household needs already but still want the registry experience and gift options?
I may have an alternative to offer you.
Your bridal party (with your input) can create milestone/everyday/date night baskets. The idea is that guests can buy items and gift cards to create baskets that give the couple practical things they need or even great dates or time together. Guests could choose a basket to create themselves or go in on a group basket. I have ideas for baskets posted below.
So the tricky part now is how to do you have people choose baskets and not repeat or buy duplicates? There is a FREE site called SignUpGenius I used it to make an example sign up for a bridal shower using the baskets below. It took me less than 10 minutes to pick a theme, create the sign up sheet and publish it. It is FREE!!!! You can simply include a link to the registry with instructions in the invitation for the shower. Here are some screen shots of the process and product from SignUpGenius which also allows you to make customizations and control the settings!
Right now you can get a FREE photo book from Shutterfly or $20 off any $20 purchase using the promotional code BIGTHANKS by Sunday, 01/22. This does not include shipping. However this is an awesome deal for those of you looking to buy some Save the Dates or make your own photo guest book!
Check out mine below! I made my guest book using a free promo code. My guests loved it and it is a great, sturdy keepsake that captures our life together up until our big day!